Life is only easier and more fulfilling when you love and respect the most important person in the world: yourself
I have a ten-minute activity for you. Here is goes: look at yourself in the mirror. Really, what do you see? What would you change? Now, describe at least three things that you love about your body. Look closely at yourself, what positive traits do you love? After three failed relationships, I had a lot of introspection I knew I had to do. Not only was I tired of being hurt by these guys, but I knew that I was the common denominator. It must be me. Really. Then I started reading motivational books, and they all had a common message: that events and certain people in our lives are the lenses that reflect what we truly feel and think about ourselves. Come to think of it I have to admit that I have been suppressing that painful feeling most people feel: low self-esteem and I guised it by trying to fix broken people. Truly I was a broken person myself, and it took my break up with my ex to realise that I had a lot of internal spring cleaning to do. So I rolled up my sleeves and began the work. These are the things I am still practicing each day. I now love myself to a point where I raised the bar of how I expect to be treated, not only by other people but by myself as well. I invite you to also try the steps I am taking to love yourself:
- Give yourself a compliment: Honestly, you are beautiful, smart and a great person. Just find it in your heart to believe it. Sing to Beyonce’s flawless song every chance you get.
- Treat yourself to a date: If you haven’t tried it before, believe me it’s worth it. Go to the movies, then dine at your favourite or a new restaurant. You might be surprised at realising that you are your greatest company.
- Pamper yourself: Hustling is our game, but retreat once in a while to recuperate. Go to a spa or spend a weekend getaway at a tranquil lodge.
- Get lost in books: Bookstores are my favourite haven these days. Make it a point to get yourself a motivational book that you can apply in your life. My current favourite is A year of Miracles by Marianne Williamson.
- Splurge a little: Yes I know that money can’t buy you love, neither will irresponsible spending. But after spending thousands of Rands spoiling my exes, it really felt good getting myself an expensive gift (that I could afford). Take it from me, it’s okay to remind yourself that you deserve to be spoilt every once in a while.
- Pray: I can’t go a day without praying, asking God for guidance in every aspect of my life. Spend time with your Creator. Meditate and ask for guidance.
- Don’t be hard on yourself: We all make mistakes. Pick yourself up, forgive yourself and learn from them.
- Give back: It’s fulfilling doing something to help someone else. Whether it’s your time, skills or financial assistance, find ways to lift a burden on someone else’s shoulder.
- Take good care of yourself: Try to get as much sleep, keep fit, maintain a healthy lifestyle and rock that outfit that makes you feel good. We might not all be flawless but looking your best increases your confidence.
- Take it easy: Life can present challenging moments so don’t let that affect you. Laugh at your silly jokes and believe in the Divine power to get you through anything.